Mostly Honest Is Not Good Enough
I eat healthy most of the time. I am in a good mood most of the time. I am prompt most of the time. These are all statements that describe me. I could strive for better, but those are probably good enough.
I need to face the fact that I am a hypocrite when I call myself a man of integrity. Being honest is not something I should do most of the time. But that’s what I do.
Integrity can be defined as the quality of being honest and fair. Integrity can also mean whole or complete, undivided or unimpaired. Mostly honest is too low a bar.
Being mostly honest is not good enough. If I am not wholly honest or completely honest, I should not consider myself a man of integrity. If I call myself a man of integrity but am only mostly honest, then I am in fact a hypocrite.
Falling Short Of A High Bar
I believe the majority of people aspire to be honest. I believe that most of the people I know or those who are taking the time to read this blog believe they are honest people.
But consider where I have fallen short or where I have seen others fall short. See if you can relate:
- Exaggerating my work hours or my efforts in a project.
- Agreeing to make monthly payments on a credit card and only paying them when it is convenient.
- Embellishing stories to make them funnier.
- Doing the majority of my child’s homework and letting her claim it as her own.
- Saying maybe or I’ll think about it when I have no intention of doing something.
- Saying I am 10 minutes away when I am actually 15 minutes away.
- Promising something more than I can deliver.
- Telling my child I did something as a child myself when in fact I did not.
- Promising my wife I will do something for her and then choosing to do something else instead.
- Blaming traffic, the weather, or other people for my own failings.
These may seem like small issues to some people. But there are no small tests to my integrity. Each time I give in to the temptation to be less than wholly honest, I am falling short.
Yes. Avoiding being mostly honesty is tough. It is a continuous fight that we all must win if we want to truly be men and women of integrity. I have discussed this in other blogs in the past:
- The Integrity Ripple Effect
- Private Tests Of A Leader’s Character
- Painful Tests Of A Leader’s Character
- Public Tests Of A Leader’s Character
- Buzzword Defined (Part 2): Integrity
The Bottom Line:
I have written often on the subject of integrity. However, I consistently get asked “What if….” questions around this. I truly believe there are very few of us who can truly claim to be wholly and completely honest.
Our sinful human nature tempts us to settle for being mostly honest. I know I will never be perfect. There has only been one perfect person to ever walk this earth. I am not Jesus Christ, and I doubt you are either.
Does that mean I should settle for being less than wholly honest in my life? No. We should all strive for the example Jesus set for us in all areas of our lives to include honesty.
Until I am wholly and completely honest, I know I have work to do. I must not settle for being mostly honest and consider that good enough.
- Would you want to work with someone who felt like being mostly honest was good enough?
- Would you want to live with someone who felt like being mostly honest was good enough?
- Would you want that person to be your parent?
- Finally, what level of respect would you have for a person who felt that way?
I need to ask myself these questions and decide if mostly honest is good enough.
Question:
In what areas do you settle for being mostly honest? Is that good enough for you?
Dave,
You know this subject is near to my heart as well. A great blog that should be re-read through out the year. Integrity is one of the four qualities that you must hire because you can’t teach. If you don’t hire it, you will have an HR issue in the making.
I have found that surrounding myself with other men/women of integrity helps me elevate my game and having true friends who call me out when I’m dancing in the ‘grey’ area. My kids are really good at that.
There is a book QBQ by John Miller that is also excellent on this issue.
We become like the people we spend the most time with. Surrounding ourselves with people who value integrity will always give us strength to fight those temptations.
Dave- You know when your sitting in church and you feel like the minister must have inside information on you because every word spoken is a direct hit- that’s how I feel every time I read your postings. Thanks for the Sharpen!
I know that feeling well! Thanks for the encouraging words.