I agreed to talk to the boss.  Three of my peers approached me about a sales campaign that they thought missed the mark.  It was our boss’s idea, but it wasn’t a good one.

Over time, I became the person my peers came to when someone needed to confront our boss.  I accepted that role and felt comfortable doing it.  I just wish my peers would have spoken directly to our boss themselves instead of going through me.

Speak Up!

I define candor as saying what needs to be said – no matter what the perceived consequences may be.

If I fail to speak with candor, I need to examine my motives.

If I am being silent out of fear or convenience, these are both failures in my character.  In fact, if I am silent when I have an opportunity to make things better I am failing.

Speaking with candor is not easy.  Speaking with candor can make things uncomfortable.  However, if I consider myself a person of high character, then I will say what needs to be said – no matter what the perceived consequences may be.

Silence when I have a chance to make my boss better is a character flaw.

Choosing Fear

One of my peers believed that if she spoke up, it would hurt her standing with our boss.  She had aspirations to lead at higher levels and did not want to jeopardize that.

In fact, a few times when she had spoken with candor, our boss did not react to it well.  The fear of a bad reaction from the boss was real.  The possibility of a good reaction was real as well.

If my decision to do the right thing is based on whether someone in authority will punish me for doing so then I am choosing to let fear have control of me.  Courage is not the absence of fear.  Courage is about taking action despite my fear.

Most people want to be a person of courage.  Few people aspire to be fearful.

“Daddy.  I want to live in fear when I grow up.  What do I need to do?”

“Sweetie.  All you need to do is choose it consistently and you too can live in fear.”

Choosing Convenience

Another of my peers never wanted to be the one who stirred the pot.  “Dave, the boss just hears it from you better.  When I do it, it becomes a long drawn out conversation or I get put on another committee as a result.”

He was right.  When I approached my boss, I had to take his analytical nature into account and prepare.  I couldn’t just approach him with an emotional argument.  I also ran the risk of getting more work as a result.

If my decision to do the right thing is based on convenience, then I am choosing to let selfishness reign in me.  The consequence of speaking up may not be personally damaging, it may just make me have to work harder.

Again, I believe few people grow up saying, “I want to be a selfish adult.”  But, when we consistently choose our convenience over speaking with candor, then that is what we have become.

The Bottom Line:

I did not always get a good reaction when I spoke up.  But, I knew my motives were in the right place.  I knew that I was speaking to my boss with candor because I wanted my boss and/or the team to get better.

Over time, my boss realized my motives were pure.  I was not playing politics.  I was interested in the growth of my boss and our team.  I was choosing my boss and my team over my own fear and my own convenience.

Imagine an entire team that was willing to speak up and say what needed to be said no matter the perceived risk.  Would the abuse of children at Penn State have continued?  Would Enron have collapsed? 

Candor is needed at all levels of all organizations.  If candor is present and expected, then imagine how the quality of the decisions of those organizations would be affected.  Imagine what your organization would be like.

Question:

What prevents you from speaking with candor?