“Argue with me.” He said it, AND he meant it. As I watched this leader invite his team to tear down his idea, I was astonished, inspired and humbled.

• Astonished: Because I had never seen a leader so readily open to criticism from the people he led.
• Inspired: Because I watched his team argue passionately for and against the leader’s point of view.
• Humbled: Because I realized I am not always confident enough to have my ideas torn down by others.

Will you listen?

It Was Astonishing

I was a young leader when I witnessed this event. Up to that point, I thought that it was foolish to challenge a leader’s ideas. When he said “Argue with me.” I thought it was a dare. Who was dumb enough to take that dare?

I didn’t know that this was standard operating procedure on his team. He would bring up a point or an idea and then invite people to disagree. He was more interested in getting to the best solution than he was in getting his way.

It Was Inspiring

As I watched his team interact, I knew I wanted that type of openness on my team. The passionate back and forth that ensued could only have happened if the leader was willing to let it happen.

I wanted to be the type of leader that led a team of leaders. A team of leaders will always work for the best solution and be passionate about their individual point of view.

But once a decision is made, a team of leaders gets behind the final decision and implements and supports the decision as if each leader had been the architect of the final solution.

Not only did this leader get the best solutions the collective team had to offer, he also got the buy-in that comes from allowing people to be heard and feel like they were a part of the process.

It Was Humbling

I was humbled when I realized I misunderstood the root cause of his confidence. He was not daring people to argue with him because he was so sure he was right. He was inviting people to argue with him because he knew he could be wrong, and he was okay with that.

That brought me to a realization that my need to be proven right often got in the way of my ability to lead the people on my team. Because I was not confident enough to allow people to prove me wrong, I was damaging the trust, the results, and the leader development within my team.

This leader’s confidence:

• Built trust – because he displayed his own willingness to adapt if a better solution was available without regard for the title of the person who shared the idea.
• Improved results – because the best solutions were always on the table for discussion not just his solutions.
• Developed leaders – because he gave each person the opportunity to develop strategies and defend those strategies within the group. By doing this, future leaders were trained to evaluate decisions through multiple point’s of view and not just their own.

The Bottom Line:

When he said “Argue with me.” He was challenging his team to be the best they could be as individuals and as a group. His self-image did not ride on “being right.” His self-image was determined by the trust, the results and the growth of the individuals on his team.

• Was I astonished? Yes!
• Was I inspired? Yes!
• Was I humbled? Yes!

But after I was astonished, inspired and humbled, I became determined.

I became determined to no longer allow my need to be right to get in the way of my team being one characterized by trust, results and growth.

I truly believe this leader created a great team and a strong culture by just saying “Argue with me.”

If you don’t agree with me, then argue with me. Please!

Question:

How willing are you to be argued with? Are you willing to change your point of view if a better solution is offered?

Do you have the Humility it takes to allow your people to disagree with you?  Take the My Mirror Character Assessment and examine your character.  IT’S PRIVATE and IT’S FREE!

www.mycharactertest.com