Give Courage!  That is what it means to encourage someone.  Some leaders often misinterpret the whole notion of encouragement.  They believe that encouraging someone is a soft skill or skill that only bubbly personalities use.  But it’s not that simple.

There is a lot more to encouraging someone than just flowery words.  Flowery words will not always result in giving someone else Courage. A leader who only uses “rah, rah” encouragement or only uses stern words will likely only reach 50% of their team.

Different Ways to Give Courage

There is no single way to encourage someone.  It is not that easy.  Some people will need one form of encouragement and some people will need another.  

As a young athlete I needed one piece of encouragement.  I needed “The Look”.  Most of the time I looked in the stands for my dad to give me Courage.  Sometimes coaches were the ones who gave me Courage.  All I needed was a nod of the head and “The Look”.  When I got “The Look”, they transferred confidence to me, and I was ready to run through brick walls.

“The Look” worked for me.  But, it is up to the leader/coach to know what form of encouragement is needed by each individual.  

Examples:

  • Verbal recognition in front of others.
  • A private hand written note of confidence.
  • A simple pat on the back or a knowing “thumbs up”.
  • A stern challenge to be better and a commitment follow-up with them.
  • Taking time to listen and confirm your understanding.
  • A challenge to do something new and then do it beside them.
  • Asking for feedback and input.

Plus, some people may need a different form of encouragement at different times.  I used to make a direct request to my bosses when I was in the corporate world.  I’d tell them “Give me a kick in the butt if I need it.”  Sometimes I needed someone to tell me the hard truth so that I would be encouraged (given Courage) to get out of a rut.

The Bottom Line:

A leader’s willingness to adapt to the needs of the led will go a long way in determining that leader’s success.  A pat on the back or a kick in the butt may be all that’s needed to give someone Courage.  But if a coach is not willing to meet the needs of the player, no one should be surprised when the player fails to respond.

Our best players need encouragement.  Our average players need encouragement.  Our struggling players need encouragement.  A true Leader of Character knows that it is the responsibility of the coach to give Courage to the team.

Encouragement:

  • Flowery language and pats on the backs?  Yes!
  • Stern challenges and a kick in the butt?  Yes!

Why?  Because when we are willing to give Courage to others in the way they need to receive it, we demonstrate that we have their best interests in mind.  That is the leader’s job.  That is the coach’s job.  To give Courage to the individuals so they can be the best they can possibly be. 

Be an Encourager – A Courage Giver!

Question:

Do you know what forms of encouragement work best for your team? For your family?

Dave Anderson is coauthor of the Amazon Best-Seller Becoming a Leader of Character – Six Habits that Make or Break a Leader at Work and at Home with his father General James L. Anderson (USA Retired).
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