Should Loyalty Trump Integrity
When President Trump purportedly asked FBI Director Comey for his loyalty, a shiver went down my spine. I wrote the following blog over 3 years ago. It’s amazing how the title and topic of this blog seem eerily prophetic. I also want to thank the President, the former Director and every politician in Washington for helping my book sales. It was not a bad time to publish a book on character.
Loyalty or Integrity?
Loyalty and Integrity are two character traits I think we all desire in ourselves and in others. I like loyal people. They are friends and co-workers I know I can depend on. It does not matter how bad the situation may be. I know I can count on the loyal people in my life.
I like people of Integrity as well. I like knowing I never have to question their words, actions, or motives. What you see is what you get. Their Integrity makes trusting them easy.
But should loyalty ever trump Integrity? Is there a time when that is appropriate?
Intellectually, most of us would argue that Integrity should always come first. Unfortunately that does not always happen. Here is a short list of when people put loyalty before Integrity:
When Loyalty Has Trumped Integrity
Loyalty To Individuals
- Previously honorable Germans who’s allegiance to Hitler allowed him to slaughter millions.
- Charles Colson and other aides to Richard Nixon as they manipulated the 1972 election resulting in Watergate.
Loyalty To Institutions
- Politicians when they use half-truths or attack opponents in order to win public support for their policies.
- Professors, coaches and players at University of North Carolina when they allowed athletes to take fake classes to help GPA’s.
The list above is short, and I am sure some people think I am being overly dramatic. But, let’s look at when we might be tempted to put loyalty before our Integrity.
Loyalty’s Temptations
- When we see a friend cheating on a test in high school or college.
- When our best friend at work asks us to omit some details in a report that may make him look bad.
- When our child asks us not to tell our spouse about something they did.
- When the best boss we ever had asks us to delay turning in some expenses until the start of the new budget cycle so he can come in under budget.
- When our best friend asks us to be silent about his mistress.
- When our spouse wants to avoid reporting some income to the IRS.
What Would You Do?
It is easy in a blog post to say I would never succumb to any of these temptations. But, I have. Unfortunately, I am not alone. Many people have let loyalty take the lead over Integrity.
The issue in these cases is Courage. Do I have the Courage at the moment to do what is right?
Integrity Stands Above Loyalty
In a world full of things I cannot control, my Integrity is one of the few things I have 100% control over. I always have a choice.
The choices are not easy. But there is always a choice – Defend my Integrity or sacrifice it.
The Cadet Honor Code at West Point states:
A cadet will not lie, cheat or steal nor tolerate those who do.
The clause on toleration is a direct reflection on how strong a pull loyalty is. At West Point, Integrity was to stand above loyalty. If I chose loyalty above Integrity, and did not turn in a friend who cheated on a test, I was just as guilty as he was.
Any cadet who chooses loyalty to a friend over Integrity faced expulsion along with his cheating friend. In the beginning for many cadets, this lesson was the hardest implement.
The Bottom Line:
For most West Point graduates, that lesson in loyalty and toleration was a defining one in the honing of our character. It was a difficult pill to swallow then, and it still is to this day.
Unfortunately, some West Point graduates, including me, have allowed loyalty to to trump Integrity.
The lesson in those cases is – we are all vulnerable to this trap.
Integrity stands above loyalty when it comes to essential character traits for all of us. We have to recognize the damage we do to our character whenever we allow loyalty to be our #1 priority.
The question we must all ask ourselves when we are tempted to put loyalty first is:
“How much do I value the most important and most controllable thing in my life?”
My Integrity
We can all look at President Trump and Mr. Comey and use them as examples to debate Loyatly vs. Integrity. But, we should all start by looking in the mirror and examining our own actions before we throw stones.
Question:
Do you think there is ever a time loyalty should trump Integrity?
Dave Anderson is coauthor of the Amazon Best-Seller Becoming a Leader of Character – Six Habits that Make or Break a Leader at Work and at Home with his father General James L. Anderson (USA Retired).
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I can’t imagine a situation where loyalty should trump integrity. I know that’s a pretty “black & white” statement in a world that seems to be all about situational ethics. But, my reasoning goes something like this……if one allows for a rationalization that places loyalty ahead of integrity, then how long will it be before that individual rationalizes away their loyalty to their friend, instituion, etc. In my mind, loyalty exists ONLY because of the integrity of the the individual exhibiting that loyalty.
I like the way you stated that: Loyalty exists only because of the integrity of the individual exhibiting that loyalty. Great words!
The toughest area I think is when you are convinced of the fact that you don’t have all the information and you are exposed to a brand new paradigm. I am thinking of the disciples when this Jesus they were following, choose to go against the law for some sort of higher law that they could not yet fully perceive, (i.e. healing on the Sabbath).
Many times in my life, I have felt ‘lead’ to go against what seemed to be ‘right and reasonable’ to so something that took ‘faith and trust.’ To somehow trust that what I was being asked to do was ultimately consistent with truth and that the one I was trusting in was integral in all his ways even when I didn’t understand what he was doing.
Great example. The good news was Christ was asking them to do something moral and right. Sometimes mans rules may be spelled out, but the moral and right thing to do is not part of those rules.
I also cannot think of any situation where loyalty should trump integrity but the question assumes that when integrity can be compromised that loyalty must fall. If the loyalty not false, then the loyal friend, colleague, member or employee owes it to the other to take the high road with integrity for both remaining intact. There are very few times that bad news ages well and fewer times that bad deeds go unnoticed. Loyal partners don’t leave when integrity is at stake, they use that loyalty to raise the integrity level of all concerned – or at least try. Otherwise, loyalty only exists as a talking point and integrity is just an ideal.
“Loyal partners don’t leave when integrity is at stake, they use that loyalty to raise the integrity level of all concerned – or at least try. Otherwise, loyalty only exists as a talking point and integrity is just an ideal.”
Great caveat!
Isn’t integrity a loyalty about ourselves ?
So how could loyalty trump integrety ?
If you are not loyal about yourself (no integrity), how could you be loyal with others ?
Interesting point. I guess some people could be so self involved and self loyal that they could make decisions that hurt others. Therefore lacking integrity and loyalty outside of themselves.
Dave, I believe you have answered this question quite nicely in your brief editorial. A loyal friend or co-worker cannot be one without the other. Integrity defines honesty and trust so if you can’t be honest and are not trustworthy how can you be loyal to anyone.
Good point Jim!
Right on, Dave! Loyalty is an outcome which is evoked from the root of what is most important, integrity!!!!
Great comment Darla! I like the way you think.
Dan Wood mentions “rationalization” in his response to your question….the infamous “R” word according to Evan Offstein, USMA ’94, in his book “Stand Your Ground”. To rationalize is to excuse ones actions at the expense of his/her integrity, more often than not. Loyalty can, and more often then not is, a subset of one’s integrity. The reverse is not necessarily the case. Once integrity is compromised, loyalty will always be questioned.
Short answer to your query “Should loyalty trump integrity?”…No.
I’m going to have to read Stand Your Ground.
It is a good read, well written and thought provoking.