Negativity Limits Your Ability to Lead
Positivity or negativity? It boils down to making a choice. Choosing negativity limits who will follow us. The attitudes we display go a long way in determining what type of leader we are and how many followers we have.
Do we choose our attitudes, or do we let our circumstances or other people choose them for us? Do we choose to focus on others or on ourselves? Do we choose to look for solutions or look problems? Our attitudes have been and always will be a matter of choice.
My father once made the now famous comment to me, “Your attitude is a choice. Make a different choice.”
The truth of that statement should affect the choices we all make when it comes to our attitudes. If anyone ever tells you they can not control their attitude – they have bought into a lie. People in difficult circumstances choose Positivity every day.
- Hospice nurses who see nothing but suffering and death yet choose to be a light in everyone’s time of darkness.
- Spouses who have a husband or wife deployed year after year, yet choose to cheerfully support the deployed spouse and run a household alone during those deployments.
- Parents who lose a child unexpectedly, yet smile through their grieving and recovery and become an example for everyone around them.
Sometimes our circumstances are difficult. But, very few of the people walking around with a negative attitude are dealing with something close to the circumstances listed above. Positivity or negativity? It boils down to making a choice.
Choosing Negativity Limits Our Influence
Positivity and negativity are both habits. Each time we make the choice between them, it makes it easier to make that same choice again. Each time we whine about our circumstances, it becomes easier to do it the next time. Each time choose to focus on what we don’t have versus what we do have, it becomes easier to do it again and again.
Pretty soon, as a result of regularly choosing negativity, we become a Joy Sucker. Wherever we go, whether we know it or not, people stop wanting to spend time with us. Why? Because we suck the joy out of their existence.
People who dwell in the world of pessimism rarely attract enthusiastic followers. They usually attract other Joy Suckers. If a leader is a gifted pessimist, he may spawn more pessimists but few followers.
A Leader of Character exercises Positivity even when things are difficult. That does not mean a Leader of Character lives in a fantasy world.
It just means she will see opportunities where others see road blocks. It means she will choose to encourage people who are struggling instead of adding to their misery. It means she will not let her feelings dictate her reactions to any situation – good or bad.
The Bottom Line:
Negativity is a habit that drives people away from us. If we choose negativity on a regular basis, we are choosing to be a person others wish to avoid. Negativity limits our ability to lead if we are driving people away from us instead of drawing them towards us.
Andersons’ 12 Word or less Definition of Positivity
Displaying a positive and/or can-do attitude in all circumstances.
That type if attitude is a choice that becomes easier each time we make the choice. People who choose Positivity in the day to day challenges of life, will find it is easier to choose Positivity when our teams or our families need it most.
Unless we make Positivity a Habit of Character we consistently choose, we will likely be a lonely individual and an ineffective leader. We decide. Positivity or negativity?
Question:
What circumstances have you chosen to allow to affect your attitude?
Great article! I appreciate the examples of people whose lives seem particularly challenging such as hospice nurses are a light for everyone they touch and others who seemingly have everything and still blow out any sign of light. It is a CHOICE!
Thank you Maureen!
While I totally agree with the message here, it is worth being clear about the difference between ‘positive but honest’ and ‘positive and blind to the issues’. There is nothing more frustrating than a leader who is fiercely positive but who refuses to acknowledge a problem – such behaviours massively damage the chances of successfully addressing the issue.
Agreed. Being positive does not mean being a Polly Anna. We must not ignore reality. But we can acknowledge the reality of the circumstances we face and then move forward with a good attitude.