“I’ve lost faith in my leaders. How do I get it back?” Great question! What do you do when you have lost faith in your leaders? They’ve let you down? They’ve broken your trust? They’ve fallen short of who you expected them to be?

This question came from a former supervisor of mine who called for some advice. Unfortunately, this is a common theme in today’s world. I hear it after doing keynotes with Fortune 50 companies, with law enforcement officers during multi-day training seminars, or when people start talking about politics at parties.

To rebound after you’ve lost faith in your leaders is not easy. We want to believe in them. We want to trust them.  We want them to live by a higher standard than everyone else. But now your disappointed, angry, and/or cautious.

Changing My Mindset

At a certain point in my corporate career, I had a good friend call me out. I felt betrayed by certain leaders in my company and my attitude stunk.

After my friend had a tough talk with me, I realized I had a choice to make.  I could wallow in my bad attitude and focus on the pain others had caused me – or I could change my mindset.

Changing Your Mindset after You Lost Faith

Changing our mindset is not dependent on our circumstances changing. To change our mindset, we have to make a decision.  In fact, we have to make three decisions.

Decision 1:  What’s in Our Control?

We can’t control what our leaders do or say. There will always be situations – large and small – when our leaders disappoint us.

The shift in my mindset began with focusing on what I could control. I stopped focusing on what my leaders weren’t doing and shifted to what I should be doing. I had things in my control. I needed to stop waiting for my leaders to change, and start taking control of my own responsibilities.

When I changed my mindset, I decided “I may not love my company, but I need to love my people.”

Decision 2:  What’s Our Duty?

Andersons’ 12 Word Definition of Duty

Taking action based on our assigned tasks and moral obligations.

It was my Duty to make that team the one everyone else wanted to work for and the one everyone wanted to do business with.  That was my moral obligation as a leader. I needed to do everything I could to help everyone on that team reach their short-term goals and their long-term potential.

Our Duty as leaders is to stop focusing on ourselves and start focusing on others. Our moral obligation is to make sure they grow, not to make sure our leaders our are perfect.

Decision 3:  Where Do We Place Our Faith?

My faith was misplaced. I always wanted to trust in my leaders. But, there is always risk involved when we trust. That is why trust is an act of Courage.

To believe that a leader or a group of leaders will never make bad decisions or break our trust is ignoring the human condition. We are not talking about simple mistakes. We are talking about mindful choices that demonstrate a character flaw.

Nobody has perfect character. Even people with strong character, make choices that let other people down.

Yes, we all want to have faith in our leaders and trust them. But, poor character choices are part of who we are, and how we grow. No one is immune from making bad choices.

Therefore, if our faith is in the inerrancy of people, we will always be disappointed.  Yes, we should have the Courage to trust.  But, we also need to evaluate where we place our faith so we can rebound faster after our leaders let us down.

The Bottom Line:

When we’ve lost faith in our leaders, we have two choices. We can stay discouraged, angry, and/or cautious. Or we can decide to change our mindset.

Those leaders and those circumstances may never change. Admitting to that reality should spur us on to move forward with our lives despite having lost faith in our leaders. It’s not up to them to change, it is up to us to change our mindset.

Question:

What can you control?

Where do your moral obligations lie?

Where are you placing your faith?  

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