What Are Leaders Afraid Of?
Fear is a natural part of the human condition. We all have fears and anxieties that we must face. Fear kicks in when we recognize risk. If there is a perceived or actual risk involved in an activity, fear raises up inside of us and will try to rationalize all the reasons we should avoid taking action.
We become the cowards we never pictured ourselves to be, because we let fear dominate us. So what are we afraid of?
What Scares Leaders?
We Are Afraid of Failure
For some, failure seems like the worst possible outcome. The thought of screwing something up is so paralyzing that we would rather do nothing than risk taking action and be proven ineffective.
We are Afraid of The Unknown
Sometimes being unsure of what is next keeps people from acting. We cannot see around the next corner, so we stop in place and wait for more clarity. Meanwhile, the world passes us by. Others with Courage, round the corner and adapt to what they find. They move forward, while we stand still.
We are Afraid of Losing Relationships
In high school and college we call this peer pressure. Most parents warn our children, “Don’t give in to peer pressure.” But then parents head to work and do exactly what they tell their kids not to do. The idea of being a tattle tale (or a snitch) at work prevents them from speaking up when something is wrong.
We are Afraid of Losing Jobs
In today’s world of work pressures, family pressures and mounting debt, the idea of losing a job can paralyze many people. The fear of telling a family or friends “I lost my job.”, the fear of searching for a new position in a job market that may not be strong in your geographic or professional area are fears that many people succumb to when making a choice between speaking up or stepping up at work.
When I was faced with the choice in the past, I would often ask myself which statement would my children want to tell their children:
2016 was a tough year because your grandfather had the courage to stand up for his convictions and lost his job.
-Or-
I am not sure what your grandfather stood for. He always did what was practical.
The lessons my kids will remember and will pass on to their kids will not be about the way I kept my job by not creating waves. They will remember the way I lived.
The question is – will those memories be memories of Courage or of cowardice?
Andersons’ Definition of Courage
Acting despite perceived or actual risk.
To read a related blog click on the following title:
Cowardice and Courage for the Front Line Leaders
The Bottom Line:
The question is why do some people face their fears and move forward while others become the proverbial ostrich and stick their heads in the sand wondering why their life is not going anywhere?
Aristotle’s answer is “You become just by doing just acts and you become brave by doing brave acts.”
The people who move forward and overcome their fears, do not have some special powers or a magic pill they take, they just have more practice in facing their fears.
Practice Exercising Courage
I do not have to go skydiving or wrestle a bear to practice facing my fears.
Here are some small choices today that will build my courage for the big tests to come:
- Do something that makes you feel uncomfortable.
- Talk to your boss about a problem he needs to address.
- Tell your spouse or your child you are sorry and ask for forgiveness.
- Talk to an employee about her inappropriate dress.
- Stop making excuses and take responsibility for your team missing a deadline.
- Step up and take charge even when it is inconvenient.
- Take a stand for something you believe in, and may not be popular with others.
- Admit your weaknesses to your team or your family (By the way, they already know them.)
In order to build a muscle, we must exercise it. If we never push the muscle outside of it’s comfort zone, it will never get stronger. Courage is a muscle that needs to be exercised.
Some people believe that when the big tests come in life, they will be ready. They believe the courage to speak up or to step up and do the right thing will be there on command. But think about this.
If I never exercised Courage in the small things in life, what makes me think I will be courageous in the big things?
Question:
What small act of Courage have you been avoiding, that will build your Courage for a big test later?